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Table for 9 please

A Fathers perspective of a huge family, finally…..

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teenagers

The New Normal…..at least for now

IMG_2524Life is such a paradox, normal or not so normal, right or wrong, good or bad…..is it not sometimes in the eye of the beholder?  Seems to me we, as a society, spend way too much time judging others and inserting our version of “normal” into places we should leave alone.  Who are we to say what is normal?  Is normal not an ever evolving snapshot of different time periods of our lives?  I know I can safely say that what I think is normal now, would not have been the norm for me 15 years ago.  As we grow older we get more and more cemented in this idea of a generalized normal behavior, or family, or look, and you know what happens, we subconsciously pass judgement on that person or situation.  Should we not be a little more forgiving for people’s different normals?  Why can we not envelop ourselves with just that, our own norm and families.   Who really cares what happens in the Jones house or how Sally dresses, those are all norms to them.  If we spent a touch more time looking within and stop worrying about what is happening all around us, this world would look incredibly different.  This is a glimpse at my new normal, because I have looked within to see that I like what I see and know that this will be an amazing ride, at least for me!

One year ago my normal daily routine was a little, well a lot, different from what it looks like today.  It looked even more different 5 years ago.  I have always been the one to wake up when the baby, or now babies, start to stir for a little sip of the liquid gold, aka breast milk.  For those who may have no kids or its been a while, the reaction for mom if you leave a little in the bottle or spill a splash of the milk, will give you the understanding on the term, “liquid gold.”  So I wake up first and start the diaper changing. Now being a veteran dad, I know the importance of regimented schedules and you should as well.  I am, however, a rookie multiples dad and its a little different.  If one gets up, the other is getting woke up for side by side feedings.  So diapers changed, bottles warming, and momma pumping the gold.  I feed the dreamboats and she helps burp and its back to bed.  All this is happening around 5 am, yes that means these boys are sleeping from 8 pm to 5 am, pretty darn consistently.  We are now convinced that there is something built into the psyche of the later babies in a big family, “I better be good, or I get no love,’  which of course is preposterous, but I will take it!  All in all, we are getting about 6 to 7 hours of continuous sleep!  Amazing, these little boys are spectacular!!  The rest of the day is a blur….

The bigs and middles, our little nicknames for the other boys, are adjusting as well to the new look of this family.  They tend to roll with the punches, but I think they are loving having these boys around as well.  There is a lot of love to go around and as this family has grown, so has the affection for life.  In the not so distant past I thought I would be a father to 2 boys and now when I look out on this landscape of my life I am ecstatic for the blessing of 7 sons.  I get to coach teams now until I am like 60, ok maybe not that long, but I won’t be a spring chicken when theses guys are teenagers.  I will be a mature and oh so wise father of 5 boys before who have made the mistakes and bad decisions that these boys will learn from.  So the new norm is, well pretty normal for this family and I would have my normal look no other way.  Carpe diem and enjoy whatever your normal consists of, and never compare what you have to what someone else’s normal looks like, you just never know who that someone may be.

Could it be? One month in….Life is really amazing

So today marks the one month birthday of my little buddies, and I must inform you of their new nickname, dreamboats.  I see all the time, someone posting on Facebook how this baby or that had stolen their heart, and it really stated to make me nauseous.  That is until these little dudes came along and sweetened this family ten fold.  Here are a few of the reasons why:  they have slept an average of 5.5 hours continuous per night, we have caught them on numerous occasions holding hands while eating, when one is fussy coming close to his brother usually calms the other down, you can surely get the picture.  When my superwoman told me she wanted “one” more kid, I must say I was not overly enthusiastic when I said sure.  Come on, who says no to that kind of request, and this has been one spectacular way to round out this table for 9!

The other cool part of these boys is the reaction of all of their siblings.  In all my years of working with kids and being a father I have yet to witness the outpouring of love that these band of brothers have displayed.  From the 8-year-old that gets up with the roosters, hence his affectionate nickname, just to hold a baby before dad heads off to the office, or the much maligned 16-year-old who every night comes into the bedroom to say goodnight and hold a baby.  All of the other boys have to kiss the babies before going to bed or we have a meltdown that makes Chernobyl seem small.  It is quite a sight to watch the affection and attention that August and Liev receive daily.  It sure makes you proud down deep, to know that someday all these boys will make amazing fathers because of these experiences.  They will look back and see what it is to be there for moments in a families existence and know how important it is to put your family first.  One lesson I have learned in working with and having a few kids, is that they are always watching and listening.  Little things we do for each other make big impacts and small kind words make a world of difference in a child’s life, especially from their dad.

Today I traveled up that 10,000 foot climb to take a look below and what I found was pure bliss.  I see a family growing into these new additions and making the adjustment quite effortless.  The view revealed a group of rowdy boy siblings sharing an abundance of love and support for the upheaval that entered this family one month ago.  Today, one month in, I am encouraged and exuberant about this future we created, and have a feeling there are a lot of marvelous times ahead.  The dreamboat keeps gaining speed and the world seemed a little bit smaller today then yesterday, carpe diem, because today was pretty unbelievable.

Day One…..I think it might have taken its toll!

Off to the new school...
Off to the new school…

This was a very proud moment as a father.  There is something special about watching your oldest make a passage towards manhood by making sacrifices.  Sometimes in life we have to go back in order to move forward.  Ahhhh, maybe all this gray hair over the years has actually meant something?!

IMG_9685
…..and after the first day at the new school

I guess this pic speaks for itself…..uphill battles build character, but can also take a lot out of you in the process.  Keep your head up son, and don’t drool on your shirt!

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