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A Fathers perspective of a huge family, finally…..

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Father’s Day

Ah, that beautifully warm and sunny day in June that we pay homage to the patriarch of the family household. There are no brunches, or jewelry sales, or flowers to buy, no dressing up to make that reservation you made a year in advance to dine overlooking the gardens.  It is, however, the final day of the U.S. Open golf tournament, a day of grilling, outdoor activities, and saying thanks to the one person that taught us the hard lessons in life, dear old dad.

So we might ask ourselves, why is a father so important anyway?  They do not provide infants with nourishment, they do not sustain life, and, for most of us, they don’t really provide us with those mushy moments of support when the tears are flowing.  We are, however, the absolute pillars of support for the American family structure.  There are some staggering statistics of sadness for fatherless youth.  I found a mind boggling blog titled, The Fatherless Generation.  The numbers contained in the”Statistics” section, paint a very grim future for todays youth that grow up without a father.  One could argue that a lot of our decaying society could be restored if the family structure of the days past was recreated.  What I mean by that is simply a two parent household, with both parents contributing equally to the upbringing of the children we bring into this world.  After all, were not both people involved in the creation?

My guide in life as a father was, and always will be my dad.  The blueprint that he laid out gave me all the insight I needed to be a great father to my children.  He came to every game, most of the time coaching the team, he listened to every crappy song I put on the radio and acted as if he liked it, he has always been an ear I could borrow in times when all I needed is a little advice.  In other words, he was present at every turn of my life, every bad decision I made, he caught me when I fell flat, then told me what I could do better, not criticize me for failing.  I would not be the man I am today without the tutelage of my dad, so to him on this day of the Father, thank you for being there and loving me unconditionally.  I love you Dad.

What is being a father though my eyes?  I have seven, yes 7, sons, which is a huge privilege, and a monstrous responsibility as a father.  These seven boys will be shaped into men under our watch.  A metamorphosis will occur, they will go from sweaty little boys that run and play, to young gentlemen that will know all of the social graces a good man should practice daily.  I will teach them to love, to throw a ball, to do algebra, to open the door for ladies, to give compliments, and most of all to be a dad.  Every day, they get to see a family that does all of those things, and it should become second nature to each of these boys.  Not a day goes by that I don’t tell my wife how beautiful she is and give her a kiss.  Children see and emulate everything we do, no matter how good or bad it may be.  Why not give them a role model, a hero to follow?  Now I would never suggest that I am a hero, by any stretch of the imagination, and neither would my father, but none the less he is my hero.  The point is, as a parent, we are our children’s hero’s, we are the ones they want to be like.  We should all take that responsibility more seriously then anything we do, this is our future we are shaping.

The point of this day in June is to become aware as fathers.  Let us all place what we do under our own microscope and re-examine the men we are and the fathers we want to be.  Be a great dad, be present in your children lives and most of all love unconditionally.  This is the greatest job in the world and I love nothing more, on this warm June day every year, then being dog piled by the boys I brought into this world.   To each of my sons, Brenden, Colin, Beau, Gray, Quinn, August, and Liev, I love each of you and would die to protect you.  Happy Father’s Day to all you dads that give so much of yourselves to create a better tomorrow.

8 months in the books…Can I blink now?

I woke up the other day and realized, one I had not posted to this blog in quite sometime, but also that my babies were now 8 months old.  I am not so sure I can remember any section of my life go by so quickly.  Why, as we get older, does life fly by in such a rapid fashion?  Not only that, but why can we not recall ANYTHING!  One would surmise with all the chaos that is contained in our lives, adding a couple of infant twins would be no big seismic event, but oh were we wrong.

The ultimate problem with time, as compared to life, is time has a finite end and life continues to tack on activities with no end.  Amazingly we accept all these extras and continue to thrive, survive, and persevere.  It may not always be a graceful acceptance of new responsibilities, but it always seems to just “work out” and life bounds onward.  Just when we think there is no earthly way to add another thing to our already overbooked calendar, we do and again life goes on.

This past 8 months has seen the addition of another practice to our already growing business, the birth of our first set of twins, and reuniting all of the 7 boys under one roof!  I will go out on a limb and say, that is pushing the limit of overload.  The funny thing is I do not feel like my life is spinning out of control, quite opposite, I have an overwhelming sense of completeness.  Weird concept to most people, considering we have 7 kids and 25 staff members we are responsible for, normal folks would likely run for the 7 seas!

Now the good stuff, the Dreamboats!  These boys have made our family so very spectacular.  What began with two little 6 lb 11 oz miracle boys, has evolved to two happy, very squishy, and amazingly fun additions to our already large family.  Every morning evolves around entering the nursery to find one of the boys, most of the time August, humming, until he sees you.  Then the smile explodes and pure excitement, with legs kicking like a hummingbird, the scene is similar to a freshly caught flounder flung on the dock. Then you pick him up, squeeze, and give tons of kisses.  There is no better start to your day then the pure love felt from your baby to their father.  Days when you “wake up on the wrong side of the bed”, are usually turned around rather swiftly.  These little guys are amazing, and having twins has been the highlight of parenting.  I truly believe having a singlet would be boring, almost a mundane series of schedules, twins bring a lot of beautiful twists and turns.  The rest of the day is filled with more of the same smiles, laughter and family fun times.

It is an amazing life, I feel blessed beyond belief each and every day I have the privilege of taking a breath.  Being a father to so many wonderful children and sharing every experience with my best friend, brings with it an overabundance of joy, pride, and love.  For seventeen years I have watched the matriculation of boys to men and babies to young men, it has been a spectacular ride, so far.  Most days I feel as if I have reversed the aging process, I feel young and energetic keeping up with this crew…well most of the time.

Well, its off to the races of nightly activities.  Carpe diem and bon appetit……

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